Melonkolie
by x.Radish.x
Summary: Megamind learns that being a hero is not only a blessing, but a burden.To find clarity, he spirits Roxanne and Minion away, hoping to learn more about the world that he has never belonged in. Three years from the defeat of Tighten.
1. Melonkolie

I'm going to go right ahead and warn all readers that this is not another humourous regale: I decided I might delve into the darker side of the struggle to be a hero ALL THE TIME. Surely it can't be easy.

Basically, I understand that both characters will seem OOC, but I did my best...I'd appreciate feedback on this one, too, because I'm considering continuing it. If I do, it will become more cheerful as I go along.

Dreamworks owns all.

* * *

The scrape of the key turning in the lock, a twist of the brass doorknob and he was home.

On weary legs, Megamind stepped into the darkness of the apartment, worried that if he turned on any lights, he would wake Roxanne. He closed the door with a quiet _thunk_ and shrugged off his cape, throwing it aside. It had been burned to a crisp in that last battle; what could he expect, fighting a villain whose fists could shoot balls of flame? Still, he did think scorch marks and soot rather suited him. He did look very dramatic with his leather pants smouldering and his eyebrows singed.

A heavy sigh passed through him, burdened by his exhaustion. Who was he kidding? Witty banter and a good fight were wildly entertaining, but he felt the evening was wasted. Why play hero when he could be here, in the peaceful quiet of Roxanne's apartment? As his eyes adjusted to the dark, he watched moonlight filter through her filmy curtains. _Their_ curtains. Granted, he still spent much time being generally ingenious in a heroic way in his lair – he refused to call his home a solitary fortress, that would be an insult to the skulking darkness and lurking shadows, and the rock music – but Roxie had insisted that her home was also his. He liked the ring to it. Welcome to _our_ home.

Cold starlight, watered down by glaring streetlamps, fell over the hulking shape of the couch and illuminated the narrow lip of a wine glass rested atop the coffee table. Megamind stepped toward it, running his finger around it to make a high, keening sound, the way Roxanne had taught him. He stopped when he found the oily remnants of red lipstick, the tattoo of her lips. She'd been drinking again. Waiting again. A bottle of sauvignon blanc stood half empty. A long foil strip of painkillers lay beside it, two tablets punched out and consumed. Megamind sighed. Roxanne had been worrying.

With something akin to quavering courage, he stole toward her bedroom – _their_ bedroom. He was bathed in the warm light of the glowing beside lamp. Just as he'd known she would be, Roxanne was sleeping on his side of the bed. One arm was curled beneath his pillow in an embrace and the other alongside her, her little pink hand fisted gently. She still wore her work clothes, tight along the thick curves of her body. Megamind rested a hand in the valley of her waist just to feel the tempo of her breathing. These nights felt too frequent, as rare as they were. It seemed everything had its costs, even the selfless act of heroism.

The rhythmic sigh of her breath was drugging and Megamind felt his eyelids droop. He pressed his face into the curve of her neck to take the scent of her, clean and sweet; like melt water off mountains he'd never seen, and pressed flowers. It occurred to him that for all his dreams, he'd never once wanted to see the world.

"Megamind?" came her whisper, hopeful and heavy with sleep. "You're safe."

"Of course," he replied, lifting his face to kiss her soft cheek. "You know I'll come home for you."

Her breath was laced with wine. "I worried."

His answer was the comfort of a kiss; he pulled her up from the bed to hold her a while. Then his long-fingered hands went to the nape of her neck to find the zipper on her dress. He still liked the way she quivered under his touch, like a young girl new to such a sensation, and the way she let him undress her, slowly, like the last present received at Christmas. He liked that when they were close to each other, he wasn't the only one who was shaking.

Her tight dress fell to her ankles and she kicked it away from herself. Megamind took a moment to drink in the sight of her; the willowy curve of her collarbone, the ripe curve of her breasts, the flat plane of her stomach, the muscles in her heavy thighs. Kneeling, he kissed these parts of her in a fashion similar to a ritual, or a prayer.

"You need to sleep," he whispered. "It's late."

"You smell like a campfire."

"A very handsome campfire, I might add."

Her palms where soft when she pressed them to the dome of his head and she stroked his skin when he pressed his cheek to her hard stomach. "I can shower, if you like."

"No," she insisted. Her voice was pleading. "Don't go anywhere. Just come to bed."

He obeyed her, but not before unclipping her bra and slipping one of his sweaters (civilian clothes – Roxanne didn't like the way his leather chapped her skin, unless he was wearing it for reasons of heroism or in circumstances where it would be removed from him quickly) over her head. He undressed himself and guided her to bed, curling around her like a shield. She turned out the light.

He hated times like this, when they clutched each other like they might be torn apart; when he came home to find her in tears, or in fits of uncontrollable trembles. He supposed that the fear of losing one another came with love for someone so deep you just knew you would stop breathing if they were to leave.

On such melon-kolie nights, Megamind couldn't help but be grateful; for he loathed them, but at least at times like this he knew he had someone to share them with.

"Roxanne?" he murmured into the soft locks of Roxanne's hair. "What would you say if I told you that I'm tired of being a hero? I mean," he said, as she began to speak, "I'm tired of being forced away from you?"

"I'd tell you to stop thinking about me," she replied. "Metro City needs you, you know that. It's not about us, it's about the collective population." He thought there was something else in her voice, like regret.

Megamind read between the lines of her words: giving up would be selfish. Metrocity needed a hero. He tightened his hold on her. He decided that maybe selfish was a nice thing.

While Roxanne drifted deep into the throes of her dreams, and for hours after, he lay awake.


	2. Second Thoughts

For the reviewers of my last chapter, thanks (: You're very nice.

I've decided to make this a bit of a project and see if I can extend it to a few more chapters...FEEDBACK would be great. Thanks.

x.

* * *

For every night that they slept beside one another, they would drift apart. Megamind would fall asleep with his arms around Roxanne's soft curves and wake to find her on the other side of the bed, away from his sharp corners and bony angles. Still, the way she looked at him when she first opened her eyes was apology enough.

As thought the night before had merely been an unpleasant dream, Roxanne smiled sleepily and rolled over to fall back into his open arms. He nuzzled into the crook of her shoulder and sighed when she kissed his forehead.

"Good morning, my hero," she whispered. The title, as corny as it was, made his chest swell.

"You forgot devilishly handsome, Roxie," he reminded her through a yawn. "But you've only just woken up, so I suppose I can accept your feeble greeting."

Chipper, she pinched his stomach. "Good thing your head is so big, or it wouldn't have room for that ego of yours."

He huffed. "I do not have an ego," he told her in the same tone he would use with a small child, or a delinquent. "I have a hefty amount of self-appreciation."

"Well, it's too demanding for this time of the morning," Roxanne replied, closing her eyes in the hopes of falling asleep.

Megamind drew back to regard her with disgust. "Excuse me for simply being so fantastic that your meagre human brain can't find words to describe it."

Half-asleep, she mumbled, "I love you."

Just as it always did, his heart beat a rapid tattoo against his rib cage upon hearing this confession. "I suppose that will do." Then, shyly, after a moment, "I love you too."

He liked the way morning light hit her skin more than he did at any other time of the day. It made her softer, somehow, and at this hour she was always too tired to bust out her attitude on him. Now, it caressed her creamy skin like the hands of a lover, drawing cool shadows along her curves and spreading a halo of light along her hairline. Her cheek was creased from the wrinkles of her pillow and her hair stood up in spikes and tangles. It was here, where she was so innocent and tranquil, that he found he loved her best.

He planted another kiss on her cheek and she wrinkled her nose at him. "You stink!" she protested as she realised the scent of smoke and dried sweat still lingered on his skin. Hauling himself out of bed, he sighed, "_Fine_, I'll take a shower."

Megamind was reluctant to remind her of the way she'd quivered before him last night, vulnerable and frightened. He accepted that she preferred to ignore the bad times only to bounce back the next day. She would be brighter and more animated than usual, as though she could make up for the tears; for eyes unmet, for words unsaid. He understood that this was the way she dealt with fear and anger. Still, it broke his heart not to hold her for longer and to have the chance to tell her how okay everything would be. It was more painful still to realise that perhaps this was not the truth.

He turned on the water and waited until it was warm enough to stand beneath, and scrubbed away all that remained of his last fight. A long, narrow burn ran up the length of his arm, a reminder that he had not been fast enough to dodge a hurtling ball of fire: it was a reminder that he was not untouchable. He wondered if having Metro Man's superhuman powers would make it any easier. Whichever way he had it, he thought, he was still alive now, so surely his velocity was satisfactory. When his skin was clean, he stood beneath the heavy stream for a few moments, pondering.

Roxanne had told him that the city needed him. He was someone to offer all of their fears and weaknesses to and someone to withstand even the darkest times so that they didn't have to. A hand to hold, a shoulder to cry on, a figure to point fingers at when something went wrong; fix it, Megamind. That's your job.

Savages. Surely they were not so pathetic that they could not do something about it for themselves? But then, he reasoned, they were human and not Roxanne, so of course they had some excuse to come crawling to someone more supremely awesome than themselves.

Hoping to leave some hot water for Roxanne, he shut off the faucet and wrapped a towel around his narrow body. He smiled when he caught sight of the mirror; someone had drawn the shape of a heart on the glass so it would show through the steam. Roxanne, as sassy and clever as she was, always found time to do the smallest things to make him feel on fire.

Then again, it could have been Minion.

As he dressed – in _jeans_, for heaven's sake, of all things…at least she'd been giving enough to buy him an AC/DC t-shirt to match – he smelt brewing coffee and heard the sounds of Roxanne's morning ritual. She would be placing last night's dishes away now. He walked quickly to the kitchen in the hope that he could watch her do so. The way she moved, with calculated grace, fascinated him.

On tiptoes to reach a shelf, plate in hand, Roxanne turned to smile at him. "Much better," she told him appraisingly. He was too entranced by the sight of her in only his sweater to retort. With him being so small, it was drawn tight over her supple body.

"I could have the brain bots do that," he said absently. She quirked an eyebrow at him, noticing his glazed eyes.

"Would you really?"

His smile was sheepish. "No."

"Put some bread in the toaster, will you? I have to get to work soon. We slept late," she said in a tone that sounded rushed. "Coffee?"

"Bleugh, _no_. You consume the most peculiar liquids," he said disgustedly. "Coffee and that _bran_ concoction you forced on me the other morning."

Roxanne hurried back into the bedroom, calling, "You didn't mind that wheatgrass shake I made for you."

"I was being _polite_!" he shot back. "Grass is for cows and horses and herbivornes. Not for superlatively intelligent and handsome geniuses, such as myself."

"Herbi_vores_," she corrected. "Correct pronunciations aren't for superlatively intelligent and handsome geniuses, either, obviously."

"That was a low blow." His pitiful tone was drowned out by the sound of the shower being switched on again. Megamind sulkily pushed the button of the toaster.

By the time she emerged from the bathroom with her bangs still damp and her work clothes askew, he had her coffee and toast laid out neatly for her on the small kitchen table. Megamind pulled a chair back for her and received her kiss with a purple blush. He had learned that romance was all the little things that they did for each other, and this humble display of affection felt odd on his usually extravagant persona. At least the strawberry jam on her toast was spread in the shape of a heart. It was all about presentation, after all.

"Thank you," Roxanne said, taking a large bite and chewing quickly. "What are your plans for today?"

"I have nothing pencilled in," he sighed. "I'll go back to the lair and spend some time with Minion."

"Will I visit after work?" she asked with a mouth full of toast and coffee. He nodded fervently.

"Yes, please," he said. "Minion will make something delicious, I'm sure."

When Roxanne finished eating, she piled her plates on the sink and then was gone in a flurry of kisses, rushed goodbyes and damp hair. Megamind stood alone in the centre of her apartment.

A thought occurred to him; while he stood here in the sunlight, it was raining somewhere else; it was night time somewhere else; it was winter, somewhere else. A yearning to be in those places struck him suddenly. He wondered how Roxanne would look under the lights of the I Fell Tower while stars burned above her. How she would look splayed on the white beaches of Australia, tanned and freckled from the sun. There was more than this city. There was more for them than this life they were living.

Grabbing his ash-coated cape, Megamind swept out of the apartment in search of Minion, and Google Images.


	3. Spinks Shminks

Thank you for the positive feedback: more on this chapter would be good!

"Paris", I would, respectfully, like to remind that all strong women have weak moments.

x.

* * *

The lair, although a place of memories of failure and loneliness, was always comforting to come home to. As much as he had come to enjoy the outside world, Megamind still found something enchanting about the gleam of a brainbot's electrified dome, or the blinking of the little coloured lights on a controller panel. High ceilings were good for echoing the cadences of his evil laughter, too. Well, only when Roxanne wasn't around, otherwise he had to practice his heroic laugh, which was beyond lame. He maintained the belief that evil was much cooler than good, even though being good felt much better than being evil.

Still, whenever Roxanne came to visit, and every time she had been dragged here unwillingly, she lit the gloomy rooms like the sun.

Now, after spending a glorious day Googling with Minion, Megamind rushed to greet Roxanne as she phased through one of the secret entrances. She clasped him tight in a hug.

"Hello," she greeted him, kissing him firmly on the lips. "Work was a nightmare today. Our editor-in-chief was admitted to hospital last night to tend her burns-" Megamind winced, for he could not save every one of them from harm, and it grated on his nerves, "-so it was an absolute disaster area. Plus the interview I was supposed to hold with your last opponent was made more difficult by the prison guards being too scared to rehydrate him."

"Fire Bug," Megamind reminded her. "He had such a tasteless costume. Flames have been done a thousand times."

"Anyway," she continued, punching him lightly, "how was your day? Oh, hello, Minion."

Minion had sidled out around the corner, grinning toothily. He loved guests. "Hello, Miss Ritchi! You look lovely in green."

Roxanne looked down at her silky emerald blouse and back to her friend. "Thank you," she smiled.

"Enough small talk!" Megamind interrupted, disgusted that the focus had slipped from him for even the slightest moment. He shot Minion a reproving look. "We have business to attend to!"

Minion clapped his mechanised hands together. "Yes! I think you'll enjoy this, Miss Ritchi."

Megamind gripped her wrist in his long fingers and jogged toward his Monitoring Room. It was there that he'd wired Roxanne's laptop to the elephantine screen (usually used for the purpose of guarding the secret entrances or watching over Metrocity). "Minion, the lights, please."

He sat in his favourite swivelly chair and pulled Roxanne onto his lap. She was looking at him quizzically. "What are you doing?"

"Showing you," he announced, "the rest of our lives."

The screen cast an eerie blue tinge over her skin and her long lashes fluttered in surprise when a blooming Greek orchid burst onto the monitor. Behind them, Minion gasped with unmasked pleasure.

"Fruit tartlets," he murmured absently.

Roxanne was less impressed. Her mouth curled up in a bemused smile. "You're planning for us to make a living as fruit-pickers?" she asked. "Sounds fun." He flapped a hand at her sarcasm.

"Wait," he urged.

A bone-white beach beneath the soaring, craggy cliffs of Corfu was next, frothy caps on the crashing sapphire waves. Next came a snapshot of the Arc De Triumphe standing mightily beneath a purple Parison twilight sky. The crumbling ruins of Machu Picchu deep in the humid Peruvian jungle. A towering mountain beneath blistering blue sky, frosted with thick winter snow.

Roxanne watched, wide-eyed and open mouthed as the images of all of the places in the world she'd ever wanted to see flashed before her eyes. A cool, glassy lake in the heart of Maine. The soaring red face of Uluru, nestled in Australia's harsh desert heart. "Megamind," she whispered, "what on earth is this?"

"Precisely that," he replied, confused. "Earth."

"Why are you showing me this?" she asked him, a nonplussed frown crinkling her brow. "We can't go to these places."

"Why not?" he replied indignantly. "I've never been anywhere in my life except for this city. I spent years plotting to rule it, and now I basically do in a non-villainous way, yet I…" He broke off. Roxanne pushed off his lap. Her eyes were wild with anger. A dark lock of hair fell over her forehead.

"You think you can just walk away from this city?" she cried. "They need a hero!"

"It's been three years!" he yelled back, standing abruptly and fisting his hands. Roxanne glowered at him. "I've been fighting and planning and protecting and _winning_ for three years, now."

"Exactly!" she replied hotly. "Because that's your _job_. You know that the citizens of Metro City _need_ someone to be around to protect and plan and fight and win and _serve them_ without wanting anything for himself! You're a hero! You can't be selfish!"

Megamind narrowed his eyes and turned away from her, to face the images that were still flickering over the screen. He saw the Egyptian desert, sparse and golden, and the soaring pyramids reaching to touch the sun.

"You know," he mused softly, "I read about a thing they have in Egypt, called the Spinks. It has a body like a very large cat and the head of a human woman." He turned back to her, seeing her firm mouth and her folded arms. "Scientists of considerable intellect (nothing compared to mine, however), think that maybe aliens built the Pie-rah-mids."

Her glare was frosty. "Spinks, Shminks. You have a responsibility."

Megamind clapped his hands to his bloated skull. "So did your beloved _Metro Man_! This isn't some lifelong jig!"

"Gig. A jig is a dance."

"And I just happened to be very good at dancing!" he snapped. "But that's irrelevant. I'm tired, Roxanne. I feel like I've been…jogging on the treadmill of life at a very brisk pace for a very long time." Then, in her stony silence, "I thought you would like this."

Roxanne sighed and went to him, holding his narrow chin in her soft hands. She smelt sweet. "Megamind…"

"Isn't it time that this city learned to protect itself? Please-men could be trained to actually _use_ their weapons instead of just hold them and tremble. There was a time before Metro Man. There was a time before me," he muttered. "Why can't there be a time after?"

Roxanne pulled him close to her and he could feel her heart beat against his chest. "I want to see the world with you," he told her. "I want to have a life with you."

"But you love fights and banter and criticising the feeble attempts at villainy that your rivals make," Roxanne reminded him gently. "Don't you?"

"But I can fight with you and you're smart enough to provide intellectual and witty banter and I can criticise _your_ feeble attempts at villainy," he shot back. She raised her eyebrows.

"When have I ever made an attempt at villainy?" she enquired. He folded his arms and tried to look menacing, like the interrogators he saw in movies.

"I heard you laughing when you flushed that dead spider down the toilet last week. Also, I know it was you who put itching powder in my jammies. We'd just had a fight and Minion is too good at laundry to mistake washing powder for itching powder," he told her darkly.

"Oh, Sir!" Minion said, abashed. He had been standing off to the side, embarrassed by his inclusion in the argument yet unsure how to leave. Now his fishy face flushed pink and he waved a falsely nonchalant hand.

"All right," Roxanne admitted. "So you can play super hero with me. What about the lair? It's your home. Why do you suddenly want to leave it so see a world you've never taken interest in?"

"You left your magazines of worldly experiences lying on the coffee table, and I get bored on my days off," he explained. "Blame Minion. He was at the pet store, flirting with a Siamese fighting fish."

"Her name is Marigold," Minion retorted. "She's very feisty."

"You read my National Geographic magazines and now you don't want to be a super hero anymore," Roxanne repeated in a tone of disbelief.

Megamind pondered this for a moment, hand upon his chin, before answering, "Yes."

"That's it." She eyed him suspiciously. The weight of her gaze cracked his resolve.

"All right!" he sighed. "All right. Last night made up my mind. I'm tired of watching what I do for a living wear you down."

She shifted uncomfortably and looked at the floor. "I was only worried. It was no big deal."

"Well, I'm sick of having to worry," he told her pertly. "Don't you think that something's wrong when your boyfriend's job makes you so unusually insecure?"

Now she met his eyes and he saw that she understood. "You're not indestructible. I'm afraid that one day you won't be-"

"Fast enough, strong enough, smart enough, handsome enough," he finished for her. "I know."

They stood apart in silence, staring in disbelief at one another.

"We've been living in a dream," Roxanne realised in a bewildered whisper.

Megamind reached out to hold her hands in his own. She gripped his fingers to comfort him.

Out of the silence, Minion chimed, "Wikipedia informed me that the Japanese eat fish raw. I think we should skip that one."

Megamind looked back and smiled at his friend. "That's one crossed off the list, then."

Roxanne said, "Well, only one hundred and ninety-five countries to go."

Megamind turned back to her and recognised the gleam in her eyes as wild excitement in the face of adventure.

"Minion," he commanded imperiously, "book us some _air-o-plain tickets._"


	4. A Jetset Villain

Fourth chapter up! Thank you for the encouragement, it's really pushing me to actually complete this!

Megamind, Minion and Roxanne decide that Paris is a suitable first destination. Why does Minion know how to speak French? Possibly because he runs out of things to do in the time between humouring his best friend and assisting in the invention of heroic objects.

I realise my translations will not be spot on, as I know no language but English, and I used an online translator. To save you the trouble I have included translations back to English at the bottom of the page.

* * *

The thrill of escapism is a liberating feeling: one that saw the ex-super-villain-come-currently-retired-super-hero flying over the ocean within three days of his proposal to explore the planet Earth. With some fervent coaxing (and the threatened use of the dehydration gun; a brief resurfacing of old ways), they had encouraged the mayor to invest in the Metro City police academy, as opposed to crying pitifully, as he had first done when they'd announced they were leaving.

"Sir, the city managed to get along before Metro Man and Megamind," Roxanne had told him gently, patting his back and shooting rolled eyes over her shoulder at Minion and Megamind, who were watching with eyebrows raised and arms folded. "And this isn't usurpation by another super villain."

"But Megamind has enhanced the city's living standard so greatly!" the mayor wailed. "I can't maintain that standard."

Megamind had sighed exaggeratedly, but the purple tinge on his cheeks told Roxanne that he was pleased by this admission. "Look, I know it's hard to imagine not having me around to complain to, and the city will be distinctly less awesome when I leave, but surely we can come to some sort of _composition."_

"Compromise, Sir," Minion had corrected. Megamind placed his hands on his hips.

"Yes, that too."

"When you look at it, Mr. Mayor," Roxanne reasoned, handing the weeping man a handkerchief and hiding a smile, "none of the surrounding civilised areas have issues with super villains, or villains of any unusual standard of ability. It's almost the presence of a super hero that demands the balance of a nemesis."

"That's why Metro Man and I have always gotten along so well," Megamind had said reminiscently, wiping a false tear. "I was his Yin, he was my Oolong."

"Uh…Yang, Sir? Oolong is a tea," Minion reminded him sheepishly. Megamind batted at this remark with a nonchalant hand.

"Whatever the case, I'm taking a long service leave," he told the mayor. "Honestly, your employee benefits are _disgraceful_."

The mayor gulped back further tears and breathed deeply to compose himself. "You're right. It's only since Metro Man's appearance that we've noticed an alarming amount of Spandex and destruction in Metro City." His chin still quivered at the thought of being abandoned. "You were our hope, Megamind."

"No," Megamind replied with faux humbleness, "I simply gave you back the hope that you lost. Indeed, my chiselled face has become something of a symbol of safety in Metrocity, but the ability to remain strong in the face of fear has belonged inside of you all along."

Roxanne had elbowed his ribs then. "You sound like Metro Man," she muttered. Megamind nodded.

"I know," he whispered back. "He gave that speech at the beginning of his super hero career." At her questioning look, he tapped his swollen cranium. "I have a very extensive memory."

The mayor was on his feet, puffing out his chest in a display of determination. "You're right. The people of Metro City will go on without you."

"I'm a little offended you gave me up that easily," Megamind muttered in disgust.

Now, circling repeatedly lower in a gradual landing pattern, Megamind held Roxanne's hand upon the aeroplane seat's armrest. He was scowling at her. "I can't believe you let him keep my brainbots. They're _my_ babies, not his. I created them with love and… and genius!"

"I refuse to travel the world with a hundred odd yapping robots following in my wake, as adorable as they are," Roxanne replied. "Besides, they'd get bored with nothing to mend or any wrenches to chase."

"I suppose," Megamind sighed sadly. "They did love a good garbage collection day. They would bring me souvenirs, like old boots and scrap metal."

He slumped in his seat and Minion loomed over the headrests from where he took up an entire seat behind them. "Cheer up, Sir," he urged. "We're in Paris!"

The city had peeked through the coverage of clouds beneath them, a glittering metropolis rich with a foreign culture; croissants; adventure. Megamind cheered up immediately and clapped his hands together.

"Oui!" he agreed. "Is that right? Www-…oui?"

"Yes," Minion smiled. "Code: parlez vous Fraincais?"

"Code: this is hardly the time for gibberish," Megamind scolded him. "Look, Roxanne! The I Fell Tower!"

Mighty in the heart of the city, the intricately woven metal structure soared up toward them like some metallic arm raised in greeting. Megamind watched Roxanne begin to smile and that light of excitement flickered to life in her eyes. He squeezed her hand.

"You won't regret this," he promised her. "This is how you and I are meant to live."

She met his eyes and leaned to kiss his jawline. "No," she replied quietly. Something in her eyes seemed softer; the lines of her brow were relaxed. "I don't think I will."

Getting through airport security was a nightmare: apparently blue men with overlarge skulls and fish with robot gorilla bodies were not a common sight in Paris. When guns had been lowered and all of the screaming had died down, Minion had calmly explained their presence in perfect French and handed over their not-very-legitimate-but-seemingly-acceptable-to-the-human-eye documentations.

"Alors vous azez pas de terroristes?" the Head of Security asked, staring wide-eyed at Roxanne's alien company. Minion smiled invitingly.

"Oui!" he promised. "Où puis-je trouver des croissants bonne?"

The baffled man eventually let them out of the airport after stamping their passports with a quivering hand, wishing them a pleasant time in the Ville de L'amour. Minion skipped ahead with their suitcases in hand, humming delightedly to himself. Megamind, however, could not move for his awe: this was something he'd _never_ seen. Narrow cobblestone streets wove in and out of buildings adorned with well-aged architecture; wrought iron balconies; arched windows that belonged along the walls of churches, or cathedrals; sloping rooves and chapped brickwork that belonged in the time of Napoleon. And everywhere, everywhere; noise, scents, colours. The acidic sweetness of orange syrup wafting from the open doors of Cacao et Chocolat; a lone artist in sunlit alleyway, painting the pigeons perched on an intricately carved fountain; a girl in red on a yellow bicycle, lifting her arm to greet passers-by; the gabble of an unfamiliar language all around him. Laughter, an excited shout, a wild yell.

"It's beautiful," he murmured. Roxanne was as awed as he, clutching his arm and pointing to new things that they passed. An entire store dedicated to champagne, amber- to sunshine-coloured liquids winking invitingly from the display window. A bent old man with two enormous baguettes under one arm and a macaw shrieking from where it was perched on his shoulder.

"The Louvre!" she cried joyously as they wandered into the city centre, where the buildings leapt back from the wide square and sparse trees lined the streets in uniformed rows. "Some of the most beautiful art in the _world_ is kept in there!"

Megamind patted her hand and leant to kiss her forehead. "We'll look at louvers later."

Minion pranced down the street, his heels barely touching the ground for all of his delight. "This is the best idea you've ever had, Sir!"

Megamind did not reply, for he was rendered speechless; there, above it all, soared the I Fell Tower – so tall he had to crane his neck just to see its uppermost reaches. He let Roxanne go and took several dazed steps toward it, staring. "That," he said, "is a structure even more awesome than my intellect."

Minion came to stand by his side, smiling up at the iconic structure. Roxanne came up behind him and wove her arms around his waist. "Welcome home," she whispered.

Minion wandered to a lonely florist's store when Megamind turned to kiss her deeply. Over the mounds of plump, overbright flowers, he watched them shyly.

"So that's a French kiss," he sighed.

"Obtenir une chamber," grumbled the florist.

* * *

Translations:

1. Minion: Do you speak French?

2. HOS: So you're not terrorists?

3. Minion: Yes! Where can I find good croissants?

4. Florist: Get a room.

REVIEWS ARE SO WELCOME IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY.

Thanks for reading.


	5. Hero Gone Tourist

THANKS to all reviewers, your support is awesome.

Megamind and Roxanne learn about the City Of Love. Translations below.

* * *

When the initial shock had worn off, Megamind was able to stop gawping at his surroundings and he allowed himself to be led to a nearby coffee shop, where Minion hoped to sample as many French pastries as he could fit into his stomach. Over bitter coffee and chocolate croissants, the trio marvelled at the people passing to and fro in front of the café window. Frost blew in clouds from people's mouths; it was, after all, wintertime here on the other side of the world. Megamind was glad for his dark jeans and the heavily-padded leather jacket Roxanne had bought him in preparation for the trip, and the striped scarf Minion had knitted for him. Roxanne, with her own matching scarf in cream and red (Megamind's was, of course, black and blue) leaned over her coffee, grateful for the warmth. He thought that she looked cute in her knitted cream sweater and brown faux leather coat. Her boots knocked against his leg as she shifted in her chair.

"I can't believe we're in Paris," she marvelled. "You realise that this is every girl's dream, right?"

"My intention the entire time, Roxie," Megamind assured her. "Not that you need extravagant around the world trips to be wooed…not when you've got a boyfriend as dastardly handsome as I."

He winced when she kicked him under the table. She was smiling. "You're really intending to take us around the entire world?"

"Yes," he told her firmly. "I want to see it all. Reined forests, oceans, desserts, cities, mountains, islands."

"A fantastic plan, Sir," Minion chimed in through a mouthful of buttery pastry. "I'd like to spend some time interacting with the oceanic life of other continents. Certainly, the fish in pet stores are entertaining, but can you imagine how _worldly_ a whale might be?"

"I'm sure it would be very interesting to interact with a whale," Megamind said, as excited as his friend. "I've heard octopi have a fantastic sense of humour."

"Very funny, Sir."

"Exactly!"

"I like the idea of spending some time by the beach," Roxanne added. "When the weather gets warmer, we could spend some time in the Pacific Isles."

"Ah! Of course! The white sands and crystal waters of the mighty Pacific!" Megamind crowed. "Perhaps when winter is over we will head south to get some sun."

"Do you have any kind of itinerary?" Roxanne asked him, leaning on her hands. Megamind shrugged.

"Not really," he admitted. "I thought winter in Europe sounded nice, and I know how much you like snow, Roxanne, so I figured we'd hop from country to country until it warmed up. I figured it would be good to take you to Australia and Asia when it was warmer. Egypt is probably another country to visit while it's cool. Wikipedia informed me that desserts are incredibly hot places."

"What about the United Arab Emirates?" Minion chimed in. "It's one of the most tourist-orientated destinations in the world."

"Yes, yes, we'll go there too," Megamind agreed.

"What about South America?"

"South America, yes, and I hope to visit Mount Everest," Megamind said, stirring his coffee. He hated its bitter taste and had used up all of the sugar sachets, leaving empty packets in a pile on the table. "Surely the tallest mountain in the world is a sight worth seeing. But for now, Paris is a good start."

"I talked to the barista and he gave me a list of hotels that he recommends," Minion said helpfully.

"Which is closest to the I Fell Tower?" Megamind asked. Minion turned in his seat.

"Pierre! Quel hôtel le plus proche de la Tour Eiffel?"

Pierre looked up from the milk he was frothing. "Le Hôtel Plaza Athénée," he replied. "le meilleur de l'argent pouvez-vous obtenir, mon ami."

"Well, if we're not concerned about the bill, what he said," Minion. "The Hôtel Plaza Athénée."

"Of course we're not concerned about the bill," Megamind assured them. "Come on. That Romanian outlet store we infrequently access? They're not just renowned for their wonderful variety of blinking lights, but also their willingness to stock weapons of minor destruction. When I was a villain I sold them loads of my inventions! They liked them so much that I got an exclusive store credit," he boasted. "I've accumulated sufficient funds for this trip. I'm not that rash."

Roxanne looked like she didn't quite believe that last statement. "You've been planning this all of that time?"

"No. I admit it was a spur of the moment decision. But! Even evil geniuses need to make a living," he shrugged. Shoving the last of his croissant into his mouth, he pushed back his chair.

"Come on," he demanded. "I don't want to miss check in times."

* * *

Hôtel Plaza Athénée was indeed luxurious. It was something out of a film: a building decorated as ornately as a wedding cake, with cheerful red awnings and stone window boxes bursting with evergreen foliage. Inside was so ridiculously lush that Roxanne and Minion couldn't help but gape: gold-plated pillars and chandeliers dripping crystals delicate as rain drops. Megamind strolled nonchalantly through the foyer as though he owned the place. Roxanne's heels clicked on the glimmering tiles.

After calming the bewildered clerk (some were more baffled by the trio's unusual appearance than others, it seemed), Minion asked for a room with a view of the Eiffel Tower. They were ushered into the lift by a bell boy pushing a gold-plated cart loaded with their luggage.

The room itself was so decadent that even Megamind had to allow himself to stare in disbelief. Plump couches crouched on plush rugs; a delicate glass coffee table sat before a roaring fire; champagne was set in an iced silver bucket on the long glass dining table. Two bedrooms branched off the enormous living room, both with impossibly comfortable beds dressed in silken linen and covered with gold-embroidered cushions. Both had en suites with deep, claw-footed baths and wide windows showing off the city below. Through a tall picture window in the lounge, the Eiffel Tower was beginning to light up for the night ahead. Rich velvet curtains framed the view.

The bell boy left after he'd received his tip and as the door closed, Minion squealed. "This is the coolest thing ever, Sir!"

"Well," Megamind said, "Why travel the world when you're not going to do it in style?"

Roxanne kissed the nape of his neck, twining her arms around his thin waist. Her fingers played with the hem of his dark sweater. "When in Rome," she added.

Megamind spun around in her arms to take her face gently in his hands. "Roxanne," he murmured, speaking to her as though she was a small child, "we're in Paris, dear."

* * *

In the haze of dé javu, Megamind followed a path of lamplight toward the bedroom where Roxanne waited. But the wine glasses on the table belonged to the two of them, and he entered the room to see her sitting with a book in her hands, snuggled beneath the covers. He closed the door quietly so he would not stir Minion, who was already snoring in the bedroom opposite. Climbing onto their bed, he marvelled at the way her long lashes caught the light of the city blazing outside and the way her eyes could be so blue that they rivalled the beauty of the ocean.

He leaned to kiss the curve of her neck. "I've missed this," he admitted.

Roxanne placed her book on the bedside table and turned to face him. "Me too."

He pulled her into him and buried his face in her tousled hair. "Roxanne," he whispered. He bent his head to kiss her and groaned when she rose to meet him halfway. He adored the soft swell of her lower lip, and the sounds she made if he cared to take it gently in his teeth. Her hands went to coax his shirt off of him. He sighed when her palms met with his skin.

He let his own hands flutter along the length of her waist until they lingered at her generous hips; the jut of her hipbones fit along his palms as snugly as a jigsaw. She wore a silken nightgown. Her skin was softer still.

When her mouth met with the skin of his neck, he felt that he might just melt. She shifted onto his narrow lap and ran her tongue along the sharp angle of his collarbone.

"Roxanne," he said again. She drew back, turned off the light.

"Megamind," she replied. When she pushed him down into the sheets, he did not struggle.

* * *

Translations:

1: Minion - Pierre! Which hotel is closest to the Eiffel Tower?

2: Pierre - The best money can buy, my friend!

As usual, reviews would be great. Thanks for reading.


	6. Show Me The World, Spaceman

Another update. (: These are going to slow over the next few days: I have to work the next four days and attend two eighteenths...so what little time I have I will be sleeping.

The trio take a jaunt across Europe. Forgive me for any geographical errors, but I wrote with my primary school atlas by my side, so it should be accurate.

* * *

It seemed that a week in the crisp Parisian winter flew by faster than the trio could blink. By the time a thin frost had crept over the city, making the narrow roads treacherous and the streets a place of peril (Megamind had fallen about laughing when Roxanne had skidded and fallen on the invisible ice; she'd laughed harder when he'd slid into a lamp post), they were checking out of their hotel and hailing a taxi to take them to the dock, where a ferry would take them across the English Channel to the city of London. Roxanne had refused to allow Megamind to book another flight to neighbouring England, and had been vehement when he suggested inventing their own private jet out of the backup generator and the hotel room's coffee machine.

"We'll travel like all tourists do," she insisted. "It's barely a long trip anyway."

Megamind had still felt smug when she had allowed him to book them first class tickets.

Minion mourned leaving Le Ville de A'moure. "The food!" he wailed. "Croissants, baguettes and even those funny little amphibian legs were heaven to my tastebuds." His expression darkened for a moment. "I must say though, the thought of bouillabaisse turned even my educated stomach."

Megamind thought he would miss the expression on Roxanne's face every morning when she would press her nose against the frost-paned window and exclaim about the snow. "It's so pretty!" she'd told him delightedly, beckoning for him to look. "Like lots of little jewels, all blown up against our glass."

Roxanne was sad to leave the winding alleyways and the bustling markets. Revealing an uncharacteristically girly streak, she'd taken an excited Minion and a grumbling Megamind to the street markets to browse stalls selling everything within the imagination. A rich blue scarf she'd purchased was wound around her neck as they waited for the train and a matching beret was perched atop her short hazelnut hair. Pretty silver hoops jangled on her wrists. She had even slung her new leather purse over her shoulder, swinging it proudly. Megamind had decided that his favourite purchase was her knee-length red coat, however, because it high-lighted the rosy tinge that blessed her cheeks when she was cold.

During their time in wintry Paris, they'd seen all that there was to see: the Arc de Triumphe, Napoleon's Tomb (or several of them) and, on Roxanne's request, the Louvre, which Megamind had found boring on account of the fact that he was no longer allowed to plot to steal all of the expensive art.

"Code: this day sucks," he stage whispered to Minion. The fish's avatar had shrugged.

"Code: Miss Ritchi seems to like it," he replied resignedly. Roxanne had turned from where she was staring wide-eyed at the Mona Lisa.

"Guys, these are genuine and unique pieces of incredibly historical and beautiful art!" she cried. Megamind sighed theatrically and rolled his eyes.

"Really? Because that statue of a lady with no arms was just absurd and who would want to see a painting of a Moaning Lisa? Look at her! She's not even smiling and she has no eyebrows!"

In the end, the three of them had agreed that the Eiffel Tower was the best part of the trip. While it was ridiculously crowded by tourists and locals alike, they had managed to shove their way over the balcony to stand at the railing. They had gazed at the view with awe.

"I want a lair that is exactly this tall," Megamind had said. "I could probably build something of a similar scale poking out of the top of the observatory."

He had not noticed the strange look Roxanne had shot him at the mention of going back, or how quiet she'd been afterward. Still, she'd laughed when Minion averred that the couple kiss beneath the tower so he could take a cheesy photograph, and the moment had been forgotten.

* * *

They reminisced their time in the City of Love until the train they'd caught from the ferry docks squealed to a stop at a station in London. Then they traipsed through the cobbled streets, much like those of Paris - yet somehow a little less romantic, or a little more grey - in search of a hearty English meal. Horse and carriages clopped by with couples curled together in the back, breathing steam; fire-engine red double-decker buses roared past, packed with passengers; Roxanne had laughed at the sight of the kitsch red telephone booths and insisted that they all try to pile inside. This was apparently a human tradition that baffled Minion and Megamind.

"I don't think this is going to work, Miss Ritchi," Minion's muffled voice said as he tried to squash his huge body inside. Megamind tried next.

"I think my head may be a little too generous in diameter," he remarked. Roxanne was breathless with laughter.

"I can't take you two anywhere!"

They had stopped for a lunch of crusty white bread and rich beef stew at a local pub. Roxanne had asked for a pint of beer, something else she insisted that one must do in London. Megamind had refused to do the same.

"Fermented barley? _Humans_," he said in disgust. Minion was too busy dropping chunks of beef into the top of his fish tank to agree.

Dropping their luggage off at a quaint hotel, they ventured out to see more of the city. First on the list was Big Ben.

"Who is this man and why do you insist upon seeing him?" Megamind had scrutinised and when Roxanne had refused to tell him, he'd fallen into a sulk. He'd brightened only a little when he realised she was referring to a clock. "Ben is a boring and common name," he muttered.

He'd been delighted, however, by the hats that the guards of the Royal Palace wore.

"Roxanne! Minion!" he cried delightedly, approaching a guard and seemingly oblivious to the way the man's eyes widened with surprise. "Their heads are even bigger than _mine_!"

They trailed back to the hotel when the light began to fade and the temperature dropped even further. Megamind's hand was curled happily around Roxanne's. His thumb ran in circles over the top of her knuckles.

"I love you," he told her over the candle lit dinner they ate in their room for two. Minion had allowed them privacy, as this hotel was much smaller than the last. "I love you so much that I was able to ignore the ridiculous accents of the locals."

"I love you too," Roxanne sighed. "This last week has been lovely."

"Yes," he said. "I don't even miss the lair or my babies."

"I do appreciate all the time off," Roxanne admitted. "But I can't imagine being away from Metro City forever."

Megamind glanced out of the window and saw flecks of snow illuminated by the soft glow of the wrought iron lamp posts. "I think I can help you with that," he said slowly.

A spontaneous carriage ride in freshly falling snow seemed perfect for taking Roxanne's mind off Metro City and her hectic job. Megamind pulled her along the still-bustling street until they found a huffing horse attached to an old-fashioned carriage standing by the curb.

"Two pound, mate," the driver asked, and Megamind handed him four. "Take us on the most scenic route around the city," he asked. Roxanne beamed at him, cute in her red coat and the scarf Minion had knitted. Snowflakes caught on her long lashes and melted on her rosy cheeks. Megamind thought she'd never looked so young.

A feeling of warmth spread through him as though he was sitting before a roaring log fire; a contentment, and attachment, a longing. He realised that he could not imagine being anywhere but right where Roxanne was at any moment in time.

As the horse trotted briskly along the River Thames, Roxanne leaned her head against his shoulder. "You never stop being romantic," she sighed. "Thank you."

He wound his arm around her waist. "That's something you can take for granted for the rest of your life," he assured her, and realised that he was a part of that ancient human ritual of courtship. He thought, with a jolt, of what the next step was.

"When in Rome," he murmured.

* * *

The thought stayed with him over the few days they remained in London and as they took a bus to Stonehenge. While Roxanne and Minion marvelled over the alien formation, Megamind thought of how Roxanne might look in white. It nagged at him when they took a train to Scotland and hopped from old-world town to old-world town and wandered the wild moors. He tried to remember what her favourite flowers were when they made the very long trip to Russia to see the peculiar and characteristic St. Basil's Cathedral and wander through Red Square. When they made a U-turn back in the direction of Greece, he remembered that she adored orchids.

Roxanne seemed to love the loud, cliff side towns of the Greek more than any other destination so far. She laughed wildly atop the lurching back of a donkey and talked loudly with the locals, when she met those who knew a little English. She played with the children by the cerulean blue ocean (it was too cold, even here, to swim) and sat with the painters in the bustling streets. When they wandered through the historic ruins in the city of Athens, she rattled off countless titbits of information about Greek mythology and the romanticised tales of Athenian gods. As she spoke, Megamind wondered if this was a good place to take her for their honeymoon.

From Greece they backtracked through Germany, Switzerland, Austria. Weeks and months passed: they saw the sights, ate the food, had various snowball fights in which Megamind lost and played the sore loser. Then the snow melted and the weather began to warm; Metrocity had never been further from Megamind's thoughts. By the time they reached Italy, he was buzzing.

Minion had thought that his plan was splendid. "Oh, Sir, it's so romantic! Where will you do it? By the Leaning Tower of Pisa?"

"Of course not," Megamind scoffed. "A tower of pizza is a ridiculous place to do something as important as this. I don't care that it's a native staple."

Megamind decided that Pompeii was an inappropriate location to do it: Roxanne was fascinated by the city entombed in centuries-old lava, but Megamind thought that the curled and bent bodies encased in the rock-hard substance made the place more than a little morbid. The Vatican City was a place that delved into the religion that surrounded his next step in the ritual, but there was not a lot of romance hidden among the churches and cathedrals and statues of religious figures.

The colourful beachside town of Cinque Terra was a little more promising, and Roxanne was delighted by the idea of a fortnight by the ocean now that it was warm enough to swim. He watched as her skin became brown and her legs became strong from hiking the cliffs of the Italian coast. In the end, he decided that there was too much distraction by the dark-haired and dark-eyed Italian boys on Vespas to do it here.

"My hoverbike is more impressive than those ridiculous little bicycles," he grumbled when Roxanne's eyes lingered a little too long on a very tanned and muscular Italian boy. She'd grinned at him reassuring and kissed his mouth.

"I prefer your complexion," she assured him. "You're much more of a bad ass than him."

Megamind's chest swelled. "I know. I don't even need training wheels anymore."

In was only when they were lounging in a luxurious waterside hotel room in the sunken city of Venice that he felt that the time was right. Megamind reserved a table for two at the Bistrot De Venice on their second night in Venice and dressed in his best suit and blue tie. Roxanne emerged from the bathroom with her hair freshly blow-dried.

"How do I look?" she asked.

She had dressed, fittingly, in white. In contrast to her bronzed skin, the dress was stunning: it dipped to display the hollow of her breastbone and tucked demurely around her tiny waist. The back hung low, exposing delicate shoulder blades and the long curve of her spine. Her strong calves tapered to strappy golden sandals that she'd bought in France; delicate golden jewellery purchased on the streets of Greece kissed her wrists, her neck and her ears. She wore no makeup but for a tint of mascara on her lashes and gloss on her lips.

"Perfect," Megamind whispered. He went to her, kissed the slender curve of her neck and the edge of her jaw. "You're beautiful, my dear."

She grinned at him and adjusted his crooked tie. "Thank you. Now let's go, I'm absolutely starving and I hear they do good ravioli."

Bistrot De Venice was a tiny little restaurant on the water's edge, bordered by a blooming rose garden and showered with glowing fairy lights. The tables were draped in red silk and a flame-orange orchid stood as a centrepiece on the table Megamind had reserved. He held Roxanne's chair for her so she wouldn't see the shaking of his hands. The tiny box in his jacket pocket felt suddenly very heavy.

After the waiter took their orders and poured their champagne, Megamind reached across the table to take Roxanne's hands in his. "I never thought I'd love like this until I met you," he murmured, staring right into her vivid blue eyes. She lowered her lashes shyly.

"I know what you mean," she went to say, until he raised a finger to her lips to still them.

"Roxanne," he told her firmly, "I honestly cannot picture myself living without you. The thought of not having you in my life is…impossible. That's why…I wanted to ask if you'd spend the rest of yours with me."

Her eyes widened and her pert little mouth formed the shape of a perfect 'O'.

"Are you-"

"I, Roxanne," he began, "am asking for your hand in mirage."

He pulled the velvet box from his lapel and opened it for her to see the shining silver band inside. A tiny glittering diamond, like a snowflake, shone atop its intricate design.

"Yes," she whispered. A shout, "Yes!"

The table was overturned as she rushed to go to him, pulling him down to kiss her roughly. She was laughing. "Mirage? The most important thing you'll ask and you got it wrong?"

"Marr-i-arge," Megamind righted himself. "That's what I said."

"And you ask me here!" she laughed. "You impossibly romantic man!"

She peppered his face with kisses and giggles, pulling away only to allow him to slip the ring onto her finger. The look in her eyes was Heaven.

"Well," Megamind said through his own overjoyed laughter. "When in Rome."

"Megamind," Roxanne replied, "we're in Venice."

* * *

(: Had to do it. I chose a diamond for Roxie's engagement ring because everyone so far seemes to use something blue...I wanted Megamind to think of someone other than himself for just a moment.

THANK YOU for reading and reviews are very welcome. Thanks to all my reviewers so far. x


	7. I Am The Push To Make You Move

I wrote this watching Slipknot live at Download, hence the title. I claim no posession: it's a line from 'Surfacing'.

Roxanne misses Metro City. Megamind can't understand why.

Now I'm going to NAP. Thanks for reading, and reviews are appreciated, as always. (:

* * *

Late the next morning, as vibrant Italian sunshine seeped through the open window, Megamind woke to gaze at the still-sleeping face of his fiancée. The soft growl of passing boats was punctuated by her soft snores. Her long, dark lashes kissed her soft cheeks and her lips were apart just slightly, so the gleam of her pearly teeth was only a suggestion.

He let his eyes wander, learning the shape of her by sight; the gentle curve of her shoulder, the indulgent swell of her hip, the deep valley between the two. He noticed a dark, perfectly round freckle to the left of her bellybutton. Below was the appealing jut of her hipbones, tracing a delicate line to a thin scar on her hip; a memory of a kidnapping gone wrong. Megamind recalled she'd received it trying to escape his lair the very first time he abducted her. The thought of the heat of anger in his eyes curled his mouth into a sly grin.

Below the heavy swell of her thighs were dimpled knees and muscled calves; fine little feet topped by ten pink and perfect toes. He thought of their first night together, so many years ago, and the way he'd shyly bent to kiss every part of her, so he could trap her taste on his tongue.

He laid a hand on her waist and leaned to nuzzle her shoulder, grinning when she swatted him away.

"Just because there's a ring on my finger doesn't mean I need any less sleep," Roxanne grumbled, but she tilted her head up to receive his kiss regardless. Her hands went to the hard swell of his skull, stroking.

"Roxanne! Come on! It's our first day as an _engaged_ couple! We've got so much to see!" Megamind urged, drawing her up and gripping her shoulders. "So much to do! We've never eaten as fiancée and fiancée before, or cleaned our teeth, or gone walking, or talked to Minion, or…everything!"

Roxanne stretched liberally and yawned, flashing her back teeth. "Okay, okay. I think a shower is in order first, though."

Megamind slumped. "_Fine_."

"You know…" Roxanne began cunningly, "we could be environmentally friendly this morning and save water by sharing a shower as an _engaged couple_."

Megamind scoffed at her ludicrous statement and gestured condescendingly out of the window. "Why would we need to conserve water? This entire city is surrounded by it. Such a suggestion is- Oh. _Oh_."

He'd caught the look on Roxanne's face and the flame in her eyes.

He let her lead him.

When they eventually made it down to breakfast in the hotel's restaurant, they met an ecstatic Minion, who'd arranged the blueberries in Roxanne's yoghurt to say 'CONGRATULATIONS' with multiple exclamation marks for extra measure. He hugged her tightly to his mechanised body.

"I'm so happy for the both of you!" he squealed. "Let me see the ring, let me see it…"

Megamind allowed Roxanne to be the centre of attention for once, sitting back and watching the two of them chatter excitedly about the colour of bridesmaids dresses. Something warm, like contentment, stole over him and he reached to grip Roxanne's hand tightly underneath the table.

"I'm hoping you'll let me bake the wedding cake, Miss Ritchi?" Minion asked. "I was thinking three layers, one chocolate, one vanilla and the third a layer of marble? White icing, of course, just to meet the traditional standard-"

"We haven't even set a date yet, I can't begin to think of how much there is to organise!" Roxanne said laughingly. "I'd love to delegate cake-baking duties to you, Minion."

They spent the morning like this, fantasising about wedding details, discussing the invites.

"We'll have to invite Bernard, I think," Roxanne realised. "Metro-come-Music Man, as well."

"Minion, I require you to be my best man…fish," Megamind commanded imperiously, but his arrogance did not stop him blushing furiously when Minion clutched him in a tight hug.

"Of course, Sir!" Minion's fish-self reached to wipe a tear with a webbed fin.

It was only when midday had passed and lunch had been finished that they moved from their table back to their rooms. Minion excused himself, eager to wander the streets of Venice in search of delicacies for that night's dinner; he'd promised to cook for them himself.

Roxanne flopped into a lounge chair in hers and Megamind's rooms, sighing deeply. "It's all so unreal!" she laughed. "I can't believe I'm actually getting married."

Megamind perched on the arm of the lounge with his hands dangling between his knees and bent to kiss her hair. "Neither can I, but I'm certainly glad that you said yes."

She turned her eyes up to his face, imploring. "Megamind, where were you thinking of getting married?"

"Where? Why, we've got the entire world at our feet! We can be married anywhere you like!" he cried happily. She bit her bottom lip, something Megamind found oddly seductive. The heat in his belly died, though, the moment she spoke.

"What about Metro City?"

"What?"

The memories of sweat and blood and ash; of a battle that never seemed to be won; of Roxanne's slumped figure on the couch before a television blaring static; of that eerie light flickering across her frightened face. The look in her eyes, sometimes, as though she was surprised that he came home.

"You want to go _back_?" he asked in disbelief. He watched the muscles in her jaw tighten.

"Yes," she said. "I do. It's my home and it's yours as well. It's Minion's."

"I thought you would like this," he said quietly, sweeping a hand to encompass the room and the watery city outside; the memories of their last few months in Europe. "I thought you would like to get away for a while, with me."

"I have liked it!" she reminded him. "I've loved the time with you and seeing parts of the world I'd only dreamed. But Megamind, it _has_ been a while. A long while. I miss my friends and my family, and my home. Hell, I even miss my _job_."

"Your mother is a pill," he said, rolling his eyes. Her eyebrows shot upward. He stammered, "B-be that as it may, I understand that you miss your friends...but isn't this lifestyle better?"

"This is not a lifestyle!" Roxanne snapped. "This is a holiday!"

Megamind frowned. "A holiday is merely a short leave taken from one's normal life, usually for the purpose of relaxation. We've not been holidaying, we've been living!"

"We've been doing nothing but travelling and seeing the world," Roxanne said. "That's a part of living, Megamind, and I'm glad you've granted me that, but it's not how people spend their entire lives. We've got no home unless it's in Metro City. We've got no stability here. I want a home and I want stability in my life!" Her eyes dropped demurely, shyly; she looked up through her lashes. "What if we decide to have children? Can you imagine trying to calm a baby on a fifteen hour flight to Hawaii? Can you imagine trying to keep a child safe on the streets of Cape Town? Or trekking through the Amazon?"

Megamind went still at the mention of children. "We would have to find someplace to protect them," he said contemplatively and Roxanne's eyes melted with these words.

"Yes," she said gently. "We would."

"But we're not even married yet! We don't have to worry about children for a long time!" he burst out. Then, with the determination of a sulky child, he said, "I don't _want_ to go back to Metrocity. What do I have there? My lair – granted, I do love having a place to express my genius – my _job_ as a super hero, the brainbots. I feel like this world has so much more to offer!"

"You have me," Roxanne said darkly. "And Minion."

"Roxanne," Megamind said pleadingly. "I don't want to go back, not yet."

"Then what do you want?" she asked. Her arms where folded and her lips to tightly pursed that the skin around them was ashen. Megamind went to kneel before her, kissing her hands, kissing her neck.

"I want you to let me try to show you what we'd be missing," he whispered. Roxanne bowed her head in a rare display of defeat.

"Fine," she said softly. "But I don't think you'll find what you're looking for."

When she took his hand in hers, Megamind met her eyes and realised that she might actually be right.

"Look, dear," he said quietly. "We've had our first fight as an engaged couple."

He took it as a good sign that she smiled, but he could not shake the bad feeling that was weighing on his narrow shoulders.


	8. Postcards From Phuket

After starbrightnights helped me with some of my discrepencies in earlier chapters, I decided I'd acutally do some research on the next destination, so here's hoping that Phuket's focus is an accurate one.

I'm surprising myself by the rate this is coming along. Your reviews really help to motivate me: so thanks AGAIN for those.

Translations are at the bottom, as usual.

* * *

Google Images had secured Megamind's belief that the beaches of Phuket were the perfect place to convince Roxanne that returning to Metrocity was an awful idea. In his mind, the city's buildings were tall glass giants to block the sun; some eternal eclipse. Among them lurked all of his troubles; the sadness in Roxanne's storm-stained eyes, or the unfilled darkness of each night he spent alone. There were battles and there was Spandex, and an astonishingly, yet somehow unsurprisingly, small amount of witty banter. Every day he felt that charming childish nature he'd always possessed slip away in skulking steps, like shooting stars disappearing over the horizon.

In comparison to the darkness weighing on his mind, autumn in Phuket was something magical. Halfway across the world from the early Italian spring, it was just as warm here in the north-west provinces of Thailand. In the so far unworn white t-shirt Roxanne had bought him in France ("I Love Paris!" it proclaimed in red letters), his skin was still prickling with beads of sweat as they left the air-conditioned confines of the Phuket Airport. Roxanne had a pair of sunglasses perched on her freckled nose; her crisp white t-shirt clung to the curves of her and her cuffed denim shorts bared the skin of her legs to the sun. Her ring sparkled on her left hand.

Minion wore his own pair of sunglasses and a purple Hawaiian t-shirt unbuttoned over his apish body. He stared around excitedly. "Now this is something different!"

It was. The city was cramped and hunched, like the buildings were tired on their foundations. In between the white-washed and stuccoed stores stood the modernised relics of elegant edifices; old temples and homes with steeped rooves and carvings typical of Asian culture. Belching buses and cars whose engines clattered shot past in blurs of colour; mechanised parrots in full flight. Amongst them, teetering tuk-tuks drove at perilous speeds, local drivers chattering away in the front, terrified tourists pale-faced in the back.

Happy enough to travel on foot, the trio made their way to a tourist information centre, where Minion asked in halting Thai where they could stay on short notice. The smiling woman behind the counter insisted upon the Aleenta Resort and Spa, away from the chaotic hustle and bustle of the city, instead resting on the beachfront.

"Sŭay ngaam, sŭay ngaam!" she assured them.

A taxi took them out of the city and to the reception of the resort, where they checked in to a poolside room with ocean views.

"If this is our last destination, I want to make the most of it," Megamind claimed.

The rooms did, indeed, make the most of staying in Phuket. Minimalistic and highly modernised, the rooms were furnished simplistically yet elegantly. Huge glass windows allowed them to view the reaching ocean from nearly every room. Roxanne's favourite room was the bathroom, where a deep, round spa the size of a small pool was stationed.

"I'm going to spend the entire time in here," she laughed, going through the array of colourful complimentary bath gels.

The beauty of the place did not, however, lift the weight that had settled over Megamind's shoulders ever since he had fought with Roxanne in Venice. He saw the delight in her eyes but knew it did not compare to the content he would see if he took her home. There was also the fact that he still used that title for Metrocity. Home.

The jet-lag from the trip left all three feeling exhausted; although it was only three in the afternoon, they went immediately to bed. Air-conditioning made the room a cold cocoon. Under the sheets, Megamind curled his body around the shape of Roxanne.

"Can you imagine being here for the rest of our lives?" he whispered into the shell of her ear. Roxanne sighed, her reply carrying her into her dreams.

"No."

His dreams were disquieting.

It was ten o'clock the next morning when they finally woke, and it was the sight of Minion's ecstatic face that greeted them. He crouched at the foot of their bed, holding a fistful of brochures.

"Sir! Miss Ritchi! Wake up!" he hollered into their bleary-eyed faces. "I have to show you something!"

Megamind waved him away. "Minion, you know even dastardly handsome masters of all things heroism need their beauty sleep."

"But this is more important than sleep," Minion insisted. "It's an _aquarium_! The Phuket Aquarium!"

"Minion, you've seen aquariums before," Roxanne grumbled, rubbing her face with her hands. Minion rolled his eyes.

"Yes, but Miss Ritchi, this aquarium has an entire aquarium_ tunnel_ that you get to walk through and even the ceiling is a massive fish tank. They have sharks! I've never spoken to a shark."

"That is neither here nor there at this time in the morning, Minion," Megamind said waspishly, pulling the covers over his head.

"I made chocolate crepes for breakfast," Minion said. Roxanne hurled herself out of bed and Megamind shot upward like he was on the light end of a seesaw.

"We'll be there in a moment," Megamind assured his aquamarine friend.

When breakfast was consumed (a brief affair, for chocolate crepes are no match for three hungry stomachs) they took a hair-raising tuk-tuk ride into Phuket to see the aquarium. Wandering through a tunnel of glass, behind which exotic fish and small sharks prowled a colourful reef, Megamind thought perhaps getting up hadn't been such a bad idea. Noticing the way Roxanne's face lit up every time a new species of fish appeared, and the way she laughed when Minion relayed the many fish's ends of the conversation to her, he thought that maybe it had been a wonderful idea. Amongst vivid scales and overbright coral, Roxanne's smile shone like a star.

He knew then that he would follow her anywhere, when for so long he thought that perhaps it was the other way around.

When Minion was tired of the aquarium – "tropical fish are very extroverted," he said indignantly, "and quite arrogant." – they were permitted to leave. Roxanne proposed a trip to the beach.

"I've always wanted to spend some time lying on a beach in the southern hemisphere," she confessed. "My mother spent some time on the east coast of Australia, and her photographs made me long to see something like that."

The beach was indeed something worth seeing. Dotted here and there with families of the locals or pale tourists in desperate need of a tan, the sand was bone-white beneath the glaring autumn sunshine. The ocean was a clear, faded turquoise lapping at the beach, fading to a deep, rich cerulean as the reef dropped out to a deep ocean trench. Narrow palms lined the beach, bent and stooped like the backs of an elderly man with the weight of their fruit. In the distance, to the east and west, the ocean gave way to soaring cliff tops; there, close to land, tall rocky outcrops like lone monoliths reached up with craggy heads to try to catch the rolling white clouds. The beauty of it took Megamind's breath.

"This has got to be the best place so far," he said in awe. Minion crouched down to chat to a hermit crab, leaving him to follow Roxanne's sunken footsteps in the sand. She stood ankle deep in the water, staring out at the hazy horizon.

"It's beautiful," she said when Megamind reached her. "We should come back here, sometime."

"You don't want to stay?" he asked shyly. He was surprised that her tone was not angry when she replied, but sad.

"You know the answer to that, dear," she whispered. Her hands found his and her fingers filled the empty gaps between his own. The warmth of her seemed completing; fulfilling, like redemption.

Megamind let her go, stooping to cup his hands in the small waves. He shot a splash of water at her, delighting in her squeals.

"Roxanne! You've wet yourself!" he giggled childishly as she wrung out her shirt. Her smile was viciously mischievous. The arm of water she shot back at him hit him in the crotch of his board shorts.

"So did you!" she shrieked, laughing. "You child!"

She was still shaking with laughter when he tackled her into the warm ocean, getting the both of them saturated. Megamind couldn't help but notice that white became see-through when wet.

"Good thing I'm wearing bikinis," Roxanne chuckled, slicking her wet hair back from her face and following his curious eyes. "Pervert."

"I am no such thing!" Megamind went to protest, before she smeared a handful of wet sand over the side of his face.

"Ha ha!"

They gambolled like children in the shallows, oblivious to the bewildered stares of the other beach goers, and the loving gaze Minion shot them.

"I love you, future husband," Roxanne told him when she'd collapsed in waist-deep water out of sheer exhaustion. Megamind sat with a splash beside her.

"You should have added 'dashingly and breath-takingly handsome and ingenious', but I suppose that's still a pleasant sentiment." He chuckled when she punched his shoulder. "I love you too, future wife."

They wandered out onto the sand, where Minion had laid out towels for them and was sitting making a sandcastle, surrounded by a small colony of hermit crabs.

"The sand is doing nothing for my joints," he complained. "Did you bring the mini vac, Sir?"

"Of course, Minion, did you really think that a brain as mighty as this could forget it?"

Roxanne shucked her clothes and stood instead in a pair of cherry red bikinis, all curves and Italian tan. Megamind realised that her eyes looked lighter, like they'd been painted the colour of the summer sky. He obeyed the urge to kiss her lips, placing his hands on her hips. A surge of something stronger than the love tailed a sudden realisation.

This was not, in fact, a life. Life was a home in Roxanne's – _their_ – city; it was taking a job to support their family; it was creating that family, and watching them grow; it was retirement with a silver-haired Roxanne, and noticing that despite her age, her hands were still so delicate and unknotted by arthritis and her eyes still had the same spark as they did when they were young.

"Roxanne," he asked, "when did you want to go home?"

The expression on her face – one of joy, of adoration – lifted the weight that hung on him like a second skin, and he greeted this with a grin.

* * *

1: Tourism Centre lady - Beautiful, beautiful!

Reviews are more than welcome, and thanks for reading!


	9. Homecoming

LAST CHAPTER. YES.

I just wanted to, as usual, thank all of those who've left reviews and favourites: your support is lovely (: Probably the reason why I've actually completed this, because nine out of ten of the larger pieces I start I never complete. I'm lazy.

ALSO, thanks for 1200 hits! I know it's comparatively small to other pieces, BUT it's still very nice for my self esteem.

Megamind, Minion and Roxanne head home after a few last days in Phuket. I've decided I'll probably do the wedding as a seperate piece, as it feels like it strays a little from the point of this story. So, keep me on author alert? That would be nice (:

Enjoy thoroughly, and I hope you have liked following this piece through to its completion!

Maddie. xx

* * *

Those last few days in Phuket were good ones. The weather held fast, with each day unseasonably warm and glaringly sunny enough for the trio to spend time enjoying their holiday. Megamind hired a motorbike, something he considered mundane next to his hoverbike, but the way Roxanne gripped his waist and cried out joyously as he took her on a high speed jaunt over the countryside made up for the lack of flight. They spent hours on a hilltop overlooking the ocean that afternoon, sitting on a thick rug and enjoying the Thai-style picnic Minion had put together for them. Roxanne looked like a girl with her hair mussed by the wind and wearing only her cuffed shorts and a singlet. Megamind held her against him while they watched the sunset; her fingers drew patterns on the outsides of his wiry legs. His fingers had slipped slyly under the fabric of her shirt, stroking the skin of her stomach. He ran his tongue along the fine edge of her ear, listening to her sigh. She'd turned on him, then, kissing him with a fierceness saved only for the moment before they made love to one another.

Other days they had spent with Minion, wandering the cramped streets and inhaling the scents of cooked meat and incense; of blossoming jasmine and foreign spices. They'd taken a longtail boat out over the reefs, marvelling at the way the ocean could be so clear, like a blue-tinted window; as they watched, sea creatures dove and darted and glided beneath them. They'd snorkelled that day, too, submerged in lukewarm water and surrounded by an alien world of pastel coral and vibrant anemones; of scales and fins and bulging bright eyes. Minion had shed his avatar, leaving it slumped in the boat, and swum in excited circles around Megamind and Roxanne, who were comparatively clumsy swimmers.

"This is incredible!" he'd cried. "Sir, can we _please_ get a salt water aquarium installed in the lair?"

Roxanne had spied a turtle lazing on the ocean floor, and swum to touch its shell; she was as startled as it was when it flinched and shot away from her reaching fingers. With gentle coaxing by Minion, it had eventually allowed her to run curious hands over its segmented shell and knobbly fins, watching her with wary brown eyes.

Megamind had spotted a reef shark, sleek and silver with a black fleck on its pointed dorsal fin. He spent the rest of the afternoon in the boat, despite Minion's reassurances that he was not on the menu.

"I won't risk having that shark rip off a vital part of my beautiful body!" he wailed, sending Roxanne into fits of laughter.

They spent another day driving through the jungle-strangled mountains of the Tak Province of northern Thailand, trekking through vine-tangled and mosquito-infested rainforest to see the Thi Lo Su and Thi Lo Re waterfalls upon Roxanne's insistence.

"It's about seeing this entire country, not just the most desirable parts," she told them, swatting a large spider from her shoulder and ignoring Megamind's scream.

The waterfalls were worth the walk; icy jets of water erupted out of the jungle's depths to pool serenely amongst the trees, bordered by jutting stones and soft moss. They dipped their feet into the cool shallows, easing blisters and aches. Hoots and squawks of the exotic wildlife echoed around them in a never ending eddy of sound. Here, Megamind felt uneasy; Roxanne, however, took photos and followed mysterious sounds with childlike curiosity. It took much coaxing to get her home.

* * *

On the very last night, Megamind entered the expansive bathroom to find Roxanne soaking her bruises and sore muscles in the wide tub, surrounded by candles and enveloped in the scent of frangipani and jasmine.

"I'm taking these bath salts home," she informed him sleepily. "They smell delicious."

Behind her, the ocean stretched past the horizon, lit by the setting sun. One of her little feet was propped on the edge of the bath, her pink toes wrinkled, and Megamind took his in his hands, squeezing and stroking in practised motions.

"I'll miss this place," he said, "for both its bath salts and its beauty."

"Me too," she admitted, pulling her foot from his hands and shifting around so her head resting on the inside of his bare thigh. He kneaded her shoulders instead. "We should come back here for our honeymoon, perhaps."

"Indeed," he replied. "I'd like that, very much."

"Do you hate me a little, for forcing you home?" she asked shyly, turning her face to kiss his skin. He shivered.

"Roxanne," he replied, "even in my most evil and villainous of moments, I could never muster an ounce of hatred for you."

"But do you really despise the thought of going home?"

Megamind contemplated this. He hated the idea of going home and falling into the niche they'd been trapped in before they left. But what if they could start over? Roxanne would take her job reporting, of course she would, but no one said he had to go back to playing the hero. If Music Man could retire, couldn't he? And if he did…squillions of scintillating possibilities! With his intellect, and his dastardly good looks, he knew that he could do just about anything he wanted, unless it was athletic. Or culinary.

He thought of the possibility of a home for himself and Roxanne. It would be large, he thought, but homey, not cold and dark like his lair (which he refused to give up, despite the ridiculous loan rates and that contemptible little man who dealt with his rent). There would be windows to display the lawn outside, and a vegetable garden for Minion. There would be a swing set for his children. He could build a tree house, or a crib for an infant. He thought of the milky smell of a newborn and the lingering scent of Roxanne's perfume; the traces of herself she left in photographs and discarded clothing and lipstick marks on coffee cups. He thought, again, of how she would look in a wedding dress, with a smile that curled the sweet bow of her mouth and crinkled the corners of her eyes.

Megamind thought of Metrocity, and he thought of home.

"No," he said firmly. "I don't."

They bathed with one another then, running soaped hands of the other's skin with tender strokes and passing long gazes, shy gazes, akin to those they'd shared years ago, when they had both felt so new. When they went to bed, they curled around each other like pieces of a puzzle; his bony waist to her curved hips; the long arch of his neck just the right shape to accommodate the soft curve of her cheek; his sleek torso to her rounded body; his thin lips against the plump lines of her mouth. Her skin was cool against his and the rhythm of her heartbeat sank into his bones.

When he woke the next morning, she was still entwined around him, right where she was meant to be.

* * *

They left late morning, their bags bulging with souvenirs and accumulated worldly goods. After the heat that sent sweat trails down Megamind's and Roxanne's back, and had Minion adding ice cubes to his tank, the air-conditioned plane was a blessing. Megamind felt some kind of creeping anticipation; a mixture of sweet nostalgia and the tingle of a new beginning. He was going home, but he would be starting something that was parallel to his old life. Forget battles and smoke and inventions and witty lines premeditated and noted; he could have most of this drama in the comfort of his own home, with Roxanne and Minion. He would create something even more fantastic for himself. Something worthy of his suave personality and incredibly handsome and breath-taking looks. Megamind felt certain that his and Roxanne's rare melon-kolie nights would become even rarer.

They slept for the majority of the flight, with several months' worth of jetlag hanging on their shoulders. They only woke when the captain's voice rattled through the intercom, informing them that they were hovering over their home city.

Megamind peered out of the window, seeing Metrocity's skyscrapers gleaming in the early morning sunshine; he thought that the way they grabbed at the sky was something akin to the I Fell Tower, or the monoliths of Phuket. He saw wide city squares and neat rows of trimmed trees, much like those in the city of Paris. The rolling hills that framed the city reminded him of a tamer version of the wild moors of Scotland; the streams and small lakes in the city's expansive parks were reminiscent of those he'd seen shot through the green wilderness of England. In Metrocity, he saw everything beautiful and exotic combined and distilled until it became something that resembled a home.

Beside him, Roxanne clutched his hand, the band of her ring cool on his skin.

* * *

Three months later and Megamind was content. He sat in a deep armchair of the home he'd found for the three of them on the outskirts of the city. Roxanne was at work, reporting cheerfully to the people of Metrocity that the city had never flourished so brilliantly; employment rates were high, the economy was booming and police finally understood that their job was more than pointing a gun and crying in fear. The crime rate was diminished, the city was clean (that was compliments of the brainbots) and people had become motivated to look after themselves, rather than relying on a heroic figure to do it for them. Music Man, his true identity hidden by his scruffy beard and his pseudonym, had finally made it in show business, playing at bars and rowdy night clubs with a passion that people could only describe as superhuman.

Really, Megamind thought, things could not have worked out better.

From the wide window in the lounge room, Megamind watched Minion weeding his vegetable garden. Behind him, a tyre swing swayed from the branch of a tall oak tree. He'd told Roxanne it was there in anticipation of their children, but she knew as well as he did that it was for his own enjoyment.

Childishness aside, Megamind had found a calling for himself, albeit temporary; he was writing an incredibly extensive biography for the Megamind Museum, which, in spite of his retirement, still stood tall and proud behind his mighty statue. He found this thoroughly enjoyable, predominantly because he got to talk about himself in great detail and without any trace of modesty.

Megamind paused over his laptop, his long fingers drawing back from the keys. Staring out at the warm autumn sunshine, a thought occurred to him; somewhere else, it was winter; it was raining; it was snowing; it was sticky tropical summer. Somewhere else in the world, people were laughing and crying and shouting and talking and drinking and eating and living.

But in each of these foreign places, he would not here the chime of Roxanne's laughter, or see the way she wore her engagement ring with pride; he would not rub her feet after she'd come home from a long day at work, or attempt to make her breakfast and end up setting the toaster on fire, or lie with her in the soothing dark of an autumn night.

He was content here in the huge home he'd bought for his family, both present and future. He thought he would continue to be, until he was too old and frail to breathe anymore.

He was, indeed, content in every part of his bright blue body.


End file.
